Skip to main content

The CyberLizard on Vacation!

The CyberLizard

Now is the time that I envy people -- people who can afford to take vacations, and have fun while they're at it. I definitely would like to know how fun it is to be able to enjoy a vacation... The last time I had a real vacation, was a few thousand miles away from home. And even then, it didn't ever seem like a vacation -- until I decided to make it one (a couple of days just before I was about to get back home).

I miss taking breaks that actually re-charges me, and not make me worry more. I'm now accepting the fact the I have to go to work and school on Monday, with this raging stuffy nose I have and do my thesis and work tasks while I'm at it. I'm currently (at the moment) waiting for the tests to finish at the ASTI cluster, which I wish I put a website on (must talk to sir Denis about that) to advertise what the ASTI and I have been up to on that Beowulf cluster.

I am also worrying HOW I could come up with a heterogeneous cluster that I can actually use (for my thesis) and not have to worry other people that will be sharing resources with me. Some faculty members at the ICS just definitely don't care whether I am running tests on the cluster, and won't think twice on removing the Ethernet link cables while I'm not there. Fortunately it hasn't caused a catastrophic test failure, but it does affect my morale more than anything. Now I'm convinced that even people at the Institute I'm studying in don't really care whether someone is really passionate about what they're doing -- they just worry about games, and meeting the grade deadline hoping and praying that the students the have taught actually learned something at least. I'm now looking for external sources of help and encouragement.

And speaking of encouragement, I remember my friend Paul complaining that the people at the ICS really don't care whether you succeed in your thesis or not -- and they don't really care that you actually do your thesis or not. Now I know what he means and it seems evident to me that they're hell bent on getting rid of students in one way or another. Now I'm beginning to doubt whether it would be worth being amidst people who teach just because nobody else would do it and don't care less if they do a good job or not. Now I think I would understand why the more talented and better instructors and professors from UPLB would rather teach somewhere else -- because they want to be paid right for the job they love doing, and would like to continue teaching without being dragged down by your colleagues who couldn't care less about the students. Maybe I'm exaggerating, but that's how I definitely feel right now.

So it seems that the link above doesn't relate to anything I've been saying, but I would like to think that The Cyberlizard has more things going for him now than while he felt trapped and obligated to drag himself to school. It would seem that I would rather be able to do my thing and be paid and encouraged while at it, compared to being ignored and let alone to perform whatever I would like to do in a n environment supposedly conducive to or contributory to excellence. I never thought that excellence came from being ignored and not valued for. Maybe I'm wrong there.

Iced, chilled, and burnt...

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Writing Again

It's 2019 and I just realised that I've not written on this blog for a long while. I feel a little bad about this so I'm picking it back up again. More importantly, I've limited my social media to just Twitter (I've deleted all my Facebook-related accounts) and will be writing more on the blog instead of engaging in other social media sites. If you want to reach me directly, you can also reach me through my keybase.io account for encrypted communication. If you have my phone number, you can also contact me through Signal. Quite a number of things have happened in the past few years and here's a quick update on things that I can share:

I've been working on XRay, a function call tracing system now part of the LLVM project. This took a good two and some years of my time at Google.Most recently I've moved to the Chrome Operations Team still here in Google Sydney. I can't give specifics yet of what I'll be working on, so stay tuned.There've been c…

A Passion Project

I was so moved today by the prospect of a passion project that I took some time on a Friday night to get it done. Let me present the #RedJeans project over at redjeans.org. I've found myself wanting to work on a project that came purely from the heart and one that was very dear to me, something that is personal, and connects with a larger community of people in the world.
The idea for redjeans.org came to me as a hint when I was writing up my reflection for 2018. I realised that I didn't spend quite as much time identifying with and working with a community. I did a bit of soul-searching and found that one of the activities I really enjoyed and cherished in years past is donating blood -- and I keep wondering why not more people do it. It was an idle thought but then a conversation with someone where I described why I wrote down "donate blood more often" in 2019 became an idea where instead of just me doing it, how about if I get my friends to do it too?

I left it a…

Appreciating Rizal...

Nope, this is not an academic post. More of a reflective and wrote-because-i-was-enlightened type post. Anyway, I just passed a paper on Rizal's notion of a nation according to Quibuyen (a local writer who devoted a book -- A Nation Aborted -- on his treatise on Rizal). Chapter 6 was an interesting read, and a definite eye opener. Rizal all of a sudden became interesting, especially to someone like me who could care less.

It seems that most of what Rizal aims for and wrote about is still evident in today's Philippines as I see it. I wonder why I didn't get to appreciate Rizal and his work when I was still in high school -- might be the fault of the high school and the curriculum, or might be because I was still considerably immature then. I wasn't able to understand most of Rizal's writings though even if I got to reading them basically because they translated from Spanish to Filipino/Tagalog. I don't have problems with Tagalog, until you put it in writing. I p…