Skip to main content

Affecting Other People's Lives

This is personal reflection. If you're not much into this kind of thing, stop reading. Consider yourself warned.

When are you most effective?

Effectiveness might be measured by how much effect you have on a certain aspect: work, life, relationships, the earth, the universe, your family, your dog's aptitude, and pretty much anything that can be affected and measured. But how do you know you're being an effective life partner, friend, manager, brother, sister, neighbor, or person? How do you measure the effect you have on other people?

I found out that you can't. That it all really depends on how you feel about other people and how you help other people become better people as you try to become better yourself. It's a matter of being appreciated, and being told that "you have affected me, and that I welcome your effect".

I found out it doesn't matter much what other people think about you, just as long as they're wrong. And that if ever other people have an effect on you, it would be alright to let them know because what you think would matter.

Telling someone "thanks, you're an angel!" or "you're the best thing that ever happened to me!" might be hard, and sometimes sound very sarcastic or even dishonest. However letting them know how you feel wouldn't hurt as well especially if they value the feedback you give. A simple "thank you, i really appreciate it" goes a long way as long as you mean it.

As for feedback you receive, take them into consideration -- because usually it helps you become the better person that can better affect other people's lives.

For feedback you give, just be honest, open, and sincere -- even if it's negative feedback.

After a while, you'll get used to it and you'll be able to deal with and you yourself give positive or negative feedback and affect other people's effectiveness.

CHill.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Writing Again

It's 2019 and I just realised that I've not written on this blog for a long while. I feel a little bad about this so I'm picking it back up again. More importantly, I've limited my social media to just Twitter (I've deleted all my Facebook-related accounts) and will be writing more on the blog instead of engaging in other social media sites. If you want to reach me directly, you can also reach me through my keybase.io account for encrypted communication. If you have my phone number, you can also contact me through Signal. Quite a number of things have happened in the past few years and here's a quick update on things that I can share:

I've been working on XRay, a function call tracing system now part of the LLVM project. This took a good two and some years of my time at Google.Most recently I've moved to the Chrome Operations Team still here in Google Sydney. I can't give specifics yet of what I'll be working on, so stay tuned.There've been c…

A Passion Project

I was so moved today by the prospect of a passion project that I took some time on a Friday night to get it done. Let me present the #RedJeans project over at redjeans.org. I've found myself wanting to work on a project that came purely from the heart and one that was very dear to me, something that is personal, and connects with a larger community of people in the world.
The idea for redjeans.org came to me as a hint when I was writing up my reflection for 2018. I realised that I didn't spend quite as much time identifying with and working with a community. I did a bit of soul-searching and found that one of the activities I really enjoyed and cherished in years past is donating blood -- and I keep wondering why not more people do it. It was an idle thought but then a conversation with someone where I described why I wrote down "donate blood more often" in 2019 became an idea where instead of just me doing it, how about if I get my friends to do it too?

I left it a…

Appreciating Rizal...

Nope, this is not an academic post. More of a reflective and wrote-because-i-was-enlightened type post. Anyway, I just passed a paper on Rizal's notion of a nation according to Quibuyen (a local writer who devoted a book -- A Nation Aborted -- on his treatise on Rizal). Chapter 6 was an interesting read, and a definite eye opener. Rizal all of a sudden became interesting, especially to someone like me who could care less.

It seems that most of what Rizal aims for and wrote about is still evident in today's Philippines as I see it. I wonder why I didn't get to appreciate Rizal and his work when I was still in high school -- might be the fault of the high school and the curriculum, or might be because I was still considerably immature then. I wasn't able to understand most of Rizal's writings though even if I got to reading them basically because they translated from Spanish to Filipino/Tagalog. I don't have problems with Tagalog, until you put it in writing. I p…