Skip to main content

Affecting Other People's Lives

This is personal reflection. If you're not much into this kind of thing, stop reading. Consider yourself warned.

When are you most effective?

Effectiveness might be measured by how much effect you have on a certain aspect: work, life, relationships, the earth, the universe, your family, your dog's aptitude, and pretty much anything that can be affected and measured. But how do you know you're being an effective life partner, friend, manager, brother, sister, neighbor, or person? How do you measure the effect you have on other people?

I found out that you can't. That it all really depends on how you feel about other people and how you help other people become better people as you try to become better yourself. It's a matter of being appreciated, and being told that "you have affected me, and that I welcome your effect".

I found out it doesn't matter much what other people think about you, just as long as they're wrong. And that if ever other people have an effect on you, it would be alright to let them know because what you think would matter.

Telling someone "thanks, you're an angel!" or "you're the best thing that ever happened to me!" might be hard, and sometimes sound very sarcastic or even dishonest. However letting them know how you feel wouldn't hurt as well especially if they value the feedback you give. A simple "thank you, i really appreciate it" goes a long way as long as you mean it.

As for feedback you receive, take them into consideration -- because usually it helps you become the better person that can better affect other people's lives.

For feedback you give, just be honest, open, and sincere -- even if it's negative feedback.

After a while, you'll get used to it and you'll be able to deal with and you yourself give positive or negative feedback and affect other people's effectiveness.

CHill.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

From FOMO to JOMO

Until very recently I believed that I needed to be on top of the latest news and happenings not only in my field (computer science and software engineering) but also in as many things as I can be on top of. This meant subscribing to all sorts of magazines, newsletters, YouTube channels, Twitch streamers, watching TV and live sport events, etc. — I was on top of a lot of the latest happenings, trends, news, interesting developments. I was having fun and I felt busy. What I did not feel was particularly effective nor productive. I felt like I was consuming so much information with the thought that it might be useful someday. When I was younger this wouldn’t have been an issue but I realised that ever since I’ve started taking stock of what I’ve been spending my time on, that a lot of it I’ve been spending just staying on top of things that I really didn’t need to be on top of. This article is about some of the realisations I’ve made in the course of exploring this issue of “FOMO” or th…

Futures and Options I: My Introduction to Computing

I've recently been thinking about how my decisions early in life have done me good to put me where I'm at right now. I've certainly lived a very fortunate life -- been blessed with so many good things and been down-right lucky being at the right place at the right time. My 30 year journey to where I am now has been very interesting. I can pretty much say that the experiences I've had up to this point have very much contributed to making me who I am -- and that I regret nothing. Still though I keep thinking about what my life would be like if I hadn't made certain choices I did make throughout the years. There are a few choices I've made that I've stuck to and I keep thinking about wondering "what if I made a different choice instead" -- and the more I think about it, the more I'm happy about the decisions I've made.

Note: This is Part 1 of a series about my early choices in life which have gotten me to where I am today. If you're intere…

A Passion Project

I was so moved today by the prospect of a passion project that I took some time on a Friday night to get it done. Let me present the #RedJeans project over at redjeans.org. I've found myself wanting to work on a project that came purely from the heart and one that was very dear to me, something that is personal, and connects with a larger community of people in the world.
The idea for redjeans.org came to me as a hint when I was writing up my reflection for 2018. I realised that I didn't spend quite as much time identifying with and working with a community. I did a bit of soul-searching and found that one of the activities I really enjoyed and cherished in years past is donating blood -- and I keep wondering why not more people do it. It was an idle thought but then a conversation with someone where I described why I wrote down "donate blood more often" in 2019 became an idea where instead of just me doing it, how about if I get my friends to do it too?

I left it a…