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Transition

I've never really taken transition periods well. All my friends know that -- or at least those that have gotten to know me over the years. But somehow, I always mess things up when they seem to be going so well. I've only recently been into something I would usually not get myself into, but here I am again being my usual self.

I have no problems with changing and adapting, but there are some things I would rather keep constant. Like how I like my coffee, or how I like to sleep (with a blanket even if it's really really hot), or how I eat my pizza -- I won't dare try eating pizza starting from the crust, it just doesn't feel right. And there are relationships that I've gotten into that I've broken up (and messed up big time) because "it just doesn't feel right". All the small things that make something up, it doesn't really figure right.

I got into a job which I wasn't sure about, and I paid the price. Now, I'm unemployed and broke -- not because I've used up all the money already, but because I haven't been paid for services rendered up to now. I couldn't get into a job I really want to have, and all that's keeping me from getting in is my 9 units remaining in college.

I could go to the US if I wanted to, and try to make it big there. Or even just stay here in the Philippines and reach my goals here. Them goals aren't really that much out of reach, but I do have to work for them. And up next in the list is a diploma. Geez, I have to definitely work on this.

However, much has changed about me between the time I first posted on this blog and now. I've been into a lot of arrangements, a lot of situations, and I've learned about myself this way. I've made a lot of mistakes, and I've learned from those mistakes in one way or another. If in case I haven't learned from it, chances are I make them again and try to learn from it as it happens.

I'm living in a metropolitan area, living a metropolitan lifestyle, and for a time working a metropolitan job. A far cry from the situation I had in the provinces where everything just seemed to halt to a grind -- on purpose. Now I like my life, and I like what I'm doing. Although I really REALLY need a job (I certainly hope I get hired by the company I want to work for the most in the meantime) to keep this lifestyle -- or else it's back to old moring province again for me.

So to all the friends, thanks for the concern. To former lovers, thanks for the time you gave up to share with me, and I'm sorry if I screw up too much -- that's just me. And to the person I first really loved, it would be nice to know what's up with you now.

To family, I'm having a blast, learning by the day. I would love to hear from you too more often.

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